In what appears to be a much needed pick-me-up in light of continuously sinking poll numbers, President Obama today awarded himself the first official Medal of Courageous Restraint for his valiant inaction in the face of the catastrophic BP oil spill off the coast of Louisiana.
In an intimate ceremony, hastily organized immediately following the President’s first press conference in ten months, Vice President Joe Biden, who just happened to be passing by the oval office at that moment, presented the medal to Mr. Obama. Biden was visibly confused when the medal was first handed to him, as he himself has no military experience to speak of. However, after Mr. Obama explained the situation to Biden through an interpreter, the ceremony continued without a hitch. Biden recited his lines nearly perfectly, earning a little silver star for his efforts.
No word yet on the chances of a repeat, based on courageous inaction in securing the border, preventing Iran from building Teh Big One or keeping North Korea from invading Seoul.
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